Cards Against Humanity, en español

(Cartas Contra la Humanidad)

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For all the horrible humans out there teaching themselves Spanish- we’ve compiled this massive vocab guide to CAH en español.... 

Officially, Cards Against Humanity only comes in English…. but, you’ll find fan translations via the CAH website in a variety of different languages and dialects. The version we’ve translated for you is "Mexican Spanish by Rafael." 

You can download your own Mexican Spanish CAD deck here, and check out other Spanish dialects here. You can also download blank cards to create your own horrible Spanish cards and customize your deck (blank white cards, blank black cards). 

We've alphabetized the guide so it's easier to look up the cards in your hand till you know em by heart. Without further ado....

The White Cards

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200 gramos de heroina = 200 grams of heroin

Abdominales espectaculares = Spectacular abs

Abejas = Bees

Abuso infantil = Child abuse

Abortos con un gancho de ropa = Coat hanger abortions

Actitud = Attitude

Acurrucarse con tu pareja = Curling up with your partner

Afros = Afros

Agricultura = Agriculture

Aguafiestas = Water parties. Basically a cross between wet blanket and party pooper.

Alcoholismo = Alcoholism

Amigos con beneficios = Friends with benefits

Amigos que se comen toda la botana = Friends who eat all of your snacks

Amputados = Amputees

Andrés Manuel lopez Obrador = Andrés Manuel lopez Obrador. Andrés Manuel lopez Obrador is a famous Mexican politician known for keeping his promises.

Aprobado por Carlos SlimTM = Approval From Carlos Slim. Carlos Slim is one of the richest businessmen in the world and holds about 40% of the Mexican stock market.

Arcadas = Arches

Arcoiris y brillo = Shining rainbow

Arnold Schwarzenegger = Arnold Schwarzenegger

Arrepentirse = Confessing

Asiáticos que no son buenos para las matemáticas = Asians who aren’t good at math

Ataques de velociraptor = Velociraptor Attacks

Atletas matemáticos = Mathletes {Literally: Mathematical athletes}

Atole con el dedo = Gruel made from fingers. {Literally: gruel with the finger}

Atragantarse y vomitar = Choking and vomiting

Atropellar a alguien = To run over someone

Aumento de tamaño natural para el caballero = Increasing natural size to “gentleman’s”

Auschwitz = Auschwitz

Autocanibalismo = autocannibalism

Aves que no vuelan = Flightless birds {Literally: wings without flight}

Bailar country = Country dancing

Barack Obama = Barack Obama

BATMAN = Batman

Bebés muertos = Dead babies

Bocafloja = Blabbermouth {Literally: Mouth-loose}

Brutalidad Policiaca = Police brutality

Britney Spears a los 55 años = Britney Spears at 55

Buffet de pizza por $50 = Pizza buffet for 50 bucks

Bukkake pixelado = Pixelated bukkake

Burritos = Burritos

Cabalgar hacia el atardecer = To ride towards the sunset

Cabellerosidad = Chivalry

Cabras comiendo latas = Goats eating cans

Cachalote = Sperm whale

Cachorritos = Puppies

Cagar enchilado = To shit enchiladas

Cagar para adentro = To shit inside

Calentamiento global = Global Warming

Calzones comestibles = Edible underwear

Cambiarse a Axtel = Becoming former governor Axtel

Carisma = Charisma

Carne de caballo = Horse meat

Carne de hombre = Meat of man

Cartas Contra la Humanidad = Cards Against Humanity

Catapultas = catapults

Células madre embrionarias = Stem cells. {Literally: embryonic mother cells}

Centauros = Centaurs

Cerveza Indio = Indio beer. Indio is a Mexican beer brand owned by Heineken Mexico. 

Chavos que no te hablan después se la primera cita = Players that don’t talk to you after the first date

Christopher Walken = Christopher Walken

Ciencia = Science

Cienciologíca = Scientology

Combustión humana espontánea = Spontaneous human combustion

Comerse el último bisonte que existe = To eat the last bison “bisonte” that exists

Comerte la torta antes del recreo = Eating all the cake before recess

Compartir jeringas = Sharing syringes

Complejo de Edipo = Oedipus complex

Concursos de belleza infantil = Child Beauty

Conde Patula = Count Duckula

Condones =  Condoms

Cuidarse de los extraños = Being babysat by strangers

Dar el 110% = Giving 110%

Darth Vader = Darth Vader

Deberes matrimoniales = Wedding vows

Decir adiós con las manos = Waving goodbye or literally “to say goodbye with the hands”

Decir chistes del Holocausto en un mal momento = To say Holocaust jokes at a bad moment

Dedear = Fingering, a made-up word from the word “dedo” which means finger

Dedos de pito = Fingers of penis/whistle

Dejar un mensaje de vos incómodo = Leaving a voice message in an uncomfortable voice Demasiado gel de pelo = Too much hair gel

Desnudez frontal = Frontal nudity

Desodorante AXE = AXE deodorant

Despertar medio desnudo en un estacionamiento = To wake up half naked in a parking lot

Destrucción mutuamente asegurada = Mutually assured destruction

Dios = God

Diseño inteligente = Intelligent Design

Disfunctión erectil = Erectile dysfunction

Disparar un rifle al aire mientras se la metes hasta adentro a un certo que esta chille y chille

Dos enanos cagando en una tina = Two elves shitting into one tub

¿Donde jugarán las niñas? = Where will the children play?

Duendes = Goblins

Dulce, dulce, venganza = Sweet, sweet revenge

El Ataque de los ositos Cariñositos = An attack of cute bears

El Big Bang = The Big Bang

El clítoris = The Clitoris

El corazón de un niño = The heart of a child

El equipo chino de gimnasia = Chinese gymnastics team

El hombre Kool-Aid = The Kool-Aid man

El incendio de la guarderia ABC = A daycare on fire

El Ku Klux Klan = The Ku Klux Klan

El Ladrón de Hamburguesas = The Hamburglar

El lechero = The milkman

El metro subterráneo = The underground subway

El miedo mismo = The same fear

El milagro de dar a luz = The miracle of giving birth

El olor de los viejitos = The smell of old people

El Papa = The Pope

El perineo = The perineum

El privilegio de los blancos = White privilege

El rapto = The rapture

El rayo de la muerte = The lightning bolt of death

El Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr = The Rev. Dr. Martin King Jr

El Sueño Americano = The American Dream

El Sur = The South

El Teletón = The Telethon

El Tesoro del Saber = The treasure of knowing

El testículo perdido de Lance Armstrong = Lance Armstrong’s missing testicle

El veradero significado de la Navidad = The true meaning of Christmas

El video del FUA =  A viral video of a “borracho” or “drunk guy” describing the Mexican cultural ideal of FUA, a force that lets one power through or achieve something beyond limits of human strength or mental/physical limitations.

Ejercicios para fomentar la sinergia del Equipo = Exercises to promote team boding

Embarazo adolescente = Teen pregnancy

Emborracharte con enjuague bucal = Getting drunk off of mouthwash

Emisiones nocturnas = Wet dreams

Emociones = Emotions

Empezar a cantar y bailar = To start to sing and dance

Encuerarte y ver Nickelodeon = To strip yourself naked and watch Nickelodeon

Enojarte tanto que se te para = Getting yourself so mad that you get hard  {Literally: get up}

Enseñarle a un robot a amar = Teaching a robot to love

Entender las luces altas = To turn on the high beams

Envidia del pene = Penis envy

Ernesto Zedillo = Ernesto Zedillo (the 54th Mexican President)

Es que no me tienes paciencia = When you don’t have any patience

Esconder una erección = To hide an erection

Escuchar activamente = Active listening

Esmegma = Smegma

Esnifar pegamento = To sniff paint

Esperanza = Hope

Esperarse hasta el matrimonio = Waiting until marriage

Estar en llamas = To burst into flame

Estrógeno = Estrogen

Estupides incuantificable = Unfathomable stupidity

Eugenesia = Eugenics

Exactamente lo que esperabas = Exactly what you wanted (esperar is a verb that means to wait for or to want)

Examenes de Admisión = Admission exams

Explosiones = Explosions

Fantasmas = Ghosts

FocusínTM =  Adderall in Spanish...FocusínTM

Fotos de tetas = tit photos

Fricción = Friction

Fuego amigo = Friendly fire

Ganchos a la mandibular = Punches to the jaw

Gandhi = Gandhi

Gays bailando quebradita = Gays dancing the “Quebradita,” a fast-paced swing dance style dance with lots of tricks and flips

Genghis Khan = Genghis Khan

Gente ardiente = Hot people

Gente blanca = White people

Gente pobre = Poor people

Gente sin casa = The homeless {Literally: people without a house}

Gladiadores Americanos = American Gladiators

Grito de mariachi inapropiado = Inappropriate Mariachi cries

Guiñarle a los viejitos = Winking at old people

Hablar como fresa = To talk like a strawberry

Hacer cabriolas = To prance

Hacer lo correcto = Doing it right

Hacer mal tercio = Being a third wheel

Hacerse tantita pipí = Peeing so much

Hacerte popo = To poop

Hacer pucheros = To get pouty

Herpes bucal =  Oral herpes

Heteronormatividad = Heteronormativity

Hombres = Men

Hombres japoneses viejitos = Old Japanese men

Horrorosos accidentes de depilación láser = Horrible accidents from Laser Hair Removal

Hoyo glorioso = A big hole

Huérfanos hermosos = Attractive orphans

Huevos de pterodáctilo = Pterodactyl eggs

Hulk Hogan = Hulk Hogan

Huracán Katrina = Hurricane Katrina

Incesto = Incest

Intercambiar cordialidades = Exchanging small talk

Inundaciones repentinas = Sudden floods

Inyecciones de hormonas = Hormonal injections

Italianos = Italians

Justicia por tu propia mano = Justice at your own hand (aka vigilante justice)

Justin Bieber = Justin Bieber

Kalimba = A thumb piano

Keanu Reeves = Keanu Reeves

Kim Jong-il = Kim Jong-il

La abuela = The grandma

La carrera de actuación de Cuautémoc Blanco = The performance career of Cuautémoc Blanco, (a Mexican soccer-player turned politician)

La cosa que te electrocuta los abdominales = The thing that electrocutes your abs

La Danza del Hada de Azúcar = Sugar Plum Fairy Dance

La fruita prohibida = Forbidden Fruit {Literally: the fruit prohibited}

La Fuerza = The Force

La inevitable muerte del universo = The inevitable death of the Universe

La insensatez del hombre = The foolishness of man

La mano pachona = A lackluster hand(job)

La maquinita que si Pudo = The little engine that could

La Noche Triste = The Night of Sorrows {literally: The Sad Night} The night of sorrows was a particular night of battle during the Spanish conquest of Mexico.

La papada de Lopéz-Doriga = Lopéz-Doriga’s double chin.

La placenta = The placenta

La Santa Biblia = The Sacred Bible

La sangre de cristo = The blood of Christ

La vagina de Elba Esther = The vagina of Elba Esther. Elba Esther Gordillo was a Mexican politician arrested for embezzlement- she made Forbes' list of "10 Most Corrupt Mexicans" (2013 was the only year they compiled one, but Mexico also made their 2014 list of most corrupt nations).

La venta de taxes a Estados Unidos = Sales taxes in the USA

La violación de nuestros derechos más básicos = The violation of our most basic rights

La voz de Morgan Freeman = The voice of Morgan Freeman

Lactancia = Breastfeeding

Lady Gaga = Lady Gaga

Lamer cosas para decir que son tuyas = Licking things to claim them as your own

Lanzamiento de enanos = Slaying elves

Laura de América = Laura of America (a Peruvian talk show hosted by Laura Bozzo)

Lepra = Leprosy

Levadura = Yeast

Ligar en la clínicia de abortos = Flirting in an abortion clinic

Limpiarle el trasero = Cleaning your ass

Limpieza étnica = Ethnic cleansing

Lluvia dorada = Golden Showers

Lobotomía con picahielo = Ice pick lobotomy

Los cholos = The Cholos. Mexican gang members

Los Gays = The gays

Los judíos = The Jews

Los Menonitas = The Mennonites

Los negros = The blacks

Los terroristas = The terrorists

Los que están muy discapacitados = Those who are very slow

Maestro Limpio justo destrás de ti = Mr. Clean right behind you

Malas decisiones de vida = Bad life decisions

Manos de sierra eléctrica = Chainsaw hands

Mario Aburto Martinez = Mario Aburto Martinez

Marta Sahagún de Fox = Marta Sahagún de Fox. Marta Sahagún de Fox is a politically active former first lady of Mexico.

Masturbación = Masturbation

Mejoras cibernéticas = Cyber improvements

Menstruación = Menstruation

Metanfetaminas = Meth labs

Metérsela por detrás = Taking it in the back… aka butt sex

Mi alma =  My soul

Mi estado de relación = My relationship status

Mi colección de juguetes = My toy collection

Mi vagina = My vagina

Mi vida sexual = My sex life

Michael Jackson = Michael Jackson

Minas terrestres = Land mines

Mis caderas = My hips

Mis demonios interiores = My inner demons

Mis genitales = My genetals

Mocos = Snot, Boogers

Monaguillos = Altar boys

Morirse = To die

Morirse de disentería = Death by dysentery

Muertes civiles = Civilian casualties {literally: civilian deaths}

Múltiples heridas con navaja = Multiple razor wounds

Muestras gratis = Free samples

Muhammad (Alabado Sea) = Muhammad (praise be unto him)

Mujere en comerciales de yogurt = Women in yogurt commercials

Música New Age = New Age Music

Muslos de acero = Muscles of Steel

Natalie Portman = Natalie Portman

Nazis = Nazis

Necrofilia = Necrophilia

Nicholas Cage = Nicholas Cage

Niños africanos = African children

Niños con cáncer en el trasero = Children with ass cancer {Literally: children with cancer in the rear)

Niños con correas = Children with Leashes. Meaning kids on toddler safety leashes/harnesses

Novelas eróticas de Harry Potter = Erotic Harry Potter novels

Obesidad = Obesity

Odiarse a si mismo = To forget yourself

Olvidar la batalla de Puebla = To forget the “Battle of the Puebla”

Oompa-Loompas = Oompa-Loompas

Orinar una piedra del riñon = Peeing a kidney stone. (piedra = stone. riñón = Kidney)

Otra maldita película de vampiros = Another bad vampire movie

Pacman tragando semen sin control = Pacman uncontrollably guzzling cum

Paletotas gigantes = Giant Boobies

Padres muertos = Dead parents

Pandilleros fresas = New gang members {Literally: fresh gang members}

Pantalones con un agujero en el trasero = Pants with a hole in the ass

Parloteo = Small talk

Partir el mar rojo = Parting the Red Sea

Pasado de lanza = Taking things too far, Dating above your status

Paty Chapoy vomitando a la vez que un grupo de arañas eclosiona en su cerebro y salen por sus ductos lagrimales = Paty Chapoy (a journalist and TV host) vomiting at the same time a group of spiders stuck in her brain come out of her eye ducts

Paz mundial = World Peace

Pedófilos = Pedophiles

Pedos vaginales = Vagina farts

Pedro Infante = Pedro Infante. Pedro Infante Cruz was a Mexican actor & singer.

Pedorrearte e irte = Farting and walking away

Peleas de gallo = Cock fights. When something belongs to someone in Spanish, there are no possessive apostrophes. Instead of Jose’s book, you say “the book of Jose.” Instead of cock fight, you say “Fights of roosters”.

Peleas sexy con almohadas = Sexy pillow fights {Literally: Sexy fights with pillows}

Peña Nieto en el desierto con buitres dándole vueltas = Peña Nieto in the desert with vultures circling. Enrique Peña Nieto is the 57th and current President of Mexico, you can follow him on twitter @EPN.

Pelotas = Balls

Perfume Euphoria(TM) de Calvin Klein = Calvin Klein Euphoria(TM) perfume

Perlas anales = Anal beads

Permanencia del objeto = Object permanence

Perras = Bitches

Piercings genitales = genital piercings

Pilotos kamikaze = Kamikaze pilots

Pintar con los dedos = Finger painting

Pizza de OreoTM = Oreo Pizza

Poner un heuvo = Being the butt of a joke that you unknowingly set up perfectly

Ponerte bien pacheco = To get really high

Porno Ademán de fetiches = German fetish porn

Porno de tentáculos = Tentacle porn

Post-its passivo-agresivos = Passive aggressive Post-its

Pre-adolescentes = Preteens

Prepucio = Foreskin

Pretender que te importa Ridículo en público = Pretending that you enjoy public ridicule

Priistas = Members of the PRI Mexican political party. The PRI (Partido Revolucionario Institucional, or The Institutional Revolutionary Party) party strives for a balance of power within the social hierarchy.

Propaganda homosexual = Homosexual propaganda

Pubertad = Puberty

Pudín de higos = Fig pudding

Pulgares opuestos = Opposable thumbs

Que te la chupen cuando manejas = Road head

Que te la jalen sin ganas = Fixing your junk without a care. Jalarse is a verb that means “to fix or to adjust oneself”.

Querer eructar y terminar vomitando en el suelo = Wanting to burp and ending up vomiting on the floor

Queso fundido = Mexican melted cheese

Quitarte la camiseta = Taking off your t-shirt

Quitarte lo gay rezando = Praying the gay away

Racismo = Racism

Regalar algo que te regalaron = To re-gift something that was given to you

Representantes de atención al cliente = Customer service representatives

Represión = Repression

Rascarte el trasero a escondidas = Scraping off your ass and hiding what you find

Retozando = Frolocking

Revendedores = Resellers

Robar tumbas = Grave robbing

Robarle un dulce a un bebé = Robbing candy from a baby

Robocop = Robocop

Robot Hitler = Robot Hitler

Robert Downey Jr. = Robert Downey Jr.

Rufies = Roofies

Sacarla =  Taking her out

Sacártela = To take it off

Sean Connery = Sean Connery

Seducción = Seduction

Selección natural = Natural selection

Seppuku =  Seppuku. A Japanese ritual suicide by disembowelment.

Ser fabuloso = Being fabulous

Ser marginalizado = To be marginalized

Ser pedante con los niños = Being pedantic with children

Ser rico = To be rich

Ser un hechicero de puta madre = Being a mother fucking sorcerer

Servidumbre = Indentured servitude

Sexo oral no reciproco = Oral sex without reciprocation

Sexo Panda = Panda sex

Sexo Sorpresa = Surprize sex

SIDA = AIDS

Skeletor = Skeletor

Slinkies enredados = Tangled Slinkies

Sobrecompensar = Overcompensating

Solos de saxofón = Saxaphone solos

Sopa Maruchan = Ramen Noodles

Sopa muy caliente = Really hot soup

Stephen Hawking hablando sucio = Stephen Hawking talking dirty

Su Majestad la Reina Elizabeth II = Her majesty the Queen Elizabeth II

Sueños guajiros = Guajiros dreams. A Guajiro is a cuban farmer.

Sufragio femenino = Women’s Suffrage {literally: female suffrage}

Super Hombres = Supermen

Tanto rollo para nada = A big deal for nothing

Te aguantas la risa cuando dicen papanicolaou = Putting up with laughter when they say papsmear

Techo de espejo = Glass ceiling {Literally: Roof of the mirror}

Tehuacanazo = Torturing someone, usually by tying their hands and pouring water through their nose, a method of torture that is usually untraceable

Tensión sexual = Sexual tension

Tétanos = Tetanus

Tercera base = 3rd base

Tiempo para mi mismo = Me time {Literally: time for my self}

Tirar un candelabro sobre tus enemigos mientras subes agarrado de la cuerda = Dropping a chandelier on your enemies while tightening the rope

Tom Cruise = Tom Cruise

Tomar solo = Drinking alone

Torcedura testicular = Testicular torsion

Trasvestis pasables = Passable transvestites

Tuitear = Tweet. Tuitear is a verb- refers to the action of tweeting

Tumor cerebral = Brain tumor

Un ano blanqueado = A bleached anus

Un caballo pequeño = A tiny horse

Un chango fumando = A smoking monkey

Un condón defectuoso = A defective condom

Un desayuno balanceado = A balanced breakfast

Un despliegue copulatorio = A sexual display. Like PDA but more intense.

Un equipo de volleybol homoerótico = A homoerrotic volleyball team

Un escote con clase = a classy cleavage {Literally: a neckline/cleavage with class}

Un faje sin ganas = Getting involved with someone just because {Literally: “sin ganas”  means “without a care”

Un feto = a fetus

Un halcón con gorrita = A hawk with a beanie

Un hombre de mediana edad en patines = A middle aged man in panties

Un homicidio muy sucio = A very brutal homicide

Un giro de trama escrito por M. Night Shyamalan = An M. Night Shyamalan plot twist

Un león de zoológico tristón = A sad zoo lion

Un mar de problemas = A sea of problems

Un micropene = a micro penis

Un molino lleno de cadáveres = A mill full of cadavers

Un mongolito robusto = A robust mongoloid

Un sombrero muy chido = A really cool hat

Un vello púbico fuera de lugar = An out of place pubic hair

Un venado gaseoso = A gassy deer

Una boca sucia = a dirty mouth

Una bolsa de frijoles mágicos = A bag of magic beans

Una buena esnifada = A good sniff/bump (of cocaine)

Una cama de agua = A water bed

Una carcicia gentil en la entrepierna = A gentle caress between the legs

Una confusión caliente = a hot mess

Una detonación termonuclear = a thermonuclear detonation

Una erección que dura mas de 4 horas = An erection that lasts more than four hours

Una fiesta de cumpleaños decepcionante = A disappointing birthday party

Una hielera llena de órganos = A cooler full of organs

Una matraca = A chatterbox

Una miradita = A little peek

Una negra descarada = A sassy black woman

Una orden de tacos = An order of tacos

Una pistola de agua llena de pipi de gato = A watergun full of cat piss

Una sobadita = A plumcake

Una sorpresa salida = a surprise exit

Una tortuga mordiendote la puntita del pene = A turtle biting the tip of your penis

Una vida de tristeza = A life full of sadness

Unas tetas operadas asimétricas = An asymmetrical boob job

Universidad = University

Universidad del Valle de Mexico = The largest college in Mexico

Unos chingazos = Some fuckers

Usar los calzones al revés para no lavarlos = Wearing underwear inside out to not wash it

Viagara® = Viagara®

Victoriano Huerta = Victoriano Huerta (the 35th President of Mexico)

Vikingos = Vikings

Vincent Fox = Vincent Fox. The 55th President of Mexico who in 2007 after his presidency was suspected of illegally siphoning money for his own personal gain.

Violar en una cita = To break a date

World of Warcraft = World of Warcraft

Whiskas®= Whistas®

The Black Cards

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_________. A que uno no te basta!

_________________.  One is not enough.

 

______________. Asi es como quiero morir.

______________. It’s like how it feels to die.

 

__________. Chócalas cuate!

__________. High fives dude!

 

__________ es bueno hasta la última gota.

__________ is good until the last drop.

 

________. Es una emboscada!

________. It’s a trap!

 

¿_________? Hay una aplicación para eso.

_______? Is there an app for that?

 

_______ te lleva fácilmente a __________.

________ leads you easily to ___________.

 

A la gente blanca le gusta ______.

White people like _________.

 

¿A que huele?

What smells?

 

¿A que huelen los viejitos?

Why do old people smell?

 

Ahora se prohíbe ______ en los aviones

______ is now banned in airplanes

 

Antes de matarlo, Dr. Bond, déjeme mostrarle ________.

Before killing him, Dr. Bond let me show him ___________.

 

Así es, maté a ______. ¿Cómo, preguntas? ________

Like this, I killed ______. How you ask? __________

 

¿Cómo mantenga el fuego en mi relación amorosa?

How to maintain “the fire” (or the passion) in a loving relationship?

 

¿Con que ayudan a las comunidades tarahumaras?

What will help the Tarahumara people?

 

¿Cuál es el mejor amigo de una mujer?

What is a girl’s best friend?

 

¿Cuál es el siguiente juguete de la cajita feliz?

What is the next happy meal toy?

 

¿Cuál es la nueva dieta maraville?

What is the new fad diet?

 

¿Cuál es mi anti-droga?

What is my anti-drug?

 

¿Cuál es mi poder secreto?

What is my secret power?

 

¿Cuál será la próxima pareja de superhéroes?

What will be the last pair of superheros?

 

Cuando me malviajaba con peyote, ____ se convirtió en _______

When I had a bad drug trip on the peyote cactus, _______ changed into __________.

 

Cuando sea Presidente de México, crearé la Secretaría de ________.

When I am president of Mexico, I will make a job the Secretary of __________.

 

Cuando sea billonario construiré una estatua de 20 metros que conmemore ______.

When a billionaire (in Spanish usually the word billionaire doesn’t exist, usually you say thousand millionaire)

 

¿De que cosa hay demasiado en le cielo?

What is there too much of in heaven?

 

Después del terremoto Niurka les llevó ________ a los Haitianos.

After the earthquake Niurka they brought __________ to the Haitians.

 

Discuple maestro, no acabé la tarea porque __________

Excuse me teacher, I did not finish homework because_______.

 

Doctor Corazón, estoy teniendo problemas con ______ y quisiera su consejo.

Dr. Heart, I am having problems with ___________ and would like your advice.

 

Durante su poco conocido Periodo Café, Picasso produjo cientos de pinturas de ______.

During his little known brown phase, Picasso made hundreds of paintings about ___________.

 

El siguiente libro de J.K. Rowling: Harry Potter y la Cámara de ______

The next book by J.K. Rowling: Harry Potter and the Chamber of _______

 

En 1,000 años, cuando el dinero en papel solo sea una memoria lejana ______ va a ser nuestra moneda nacional.

In 1,000 years when paper money is just a distant memory, _________ will be our national currency.

 

En la cárcel, dicen que puedes cambiar 200 cigarros por ________.

In jail, they say you can trade 200 cigarettes for _____________.

 

En una nueva telenovela de Televisa, Belinda tiene problemas con _______ por primera vez.

In a new Telenovela, Belinda has problems with _______ for the first time. (Telenovelas are kinda like Spanish soap operas)

 

Es una pena que los niños de ahora se involucren en _____

It’s a pity that kids of today are involved in _______

 

El mundo se va a acabar, el mundo se va a acabar, ________ es lo que nos va a matar.

The world will end, the world will end, ________ will kill us.

 

El nuevo reality de MTV se trata de 8 celebridades fracasadas viviendo con _________.

The new reality MTV show is about 8 failed celebrities living with ___________.

 

El viaje escolar quedó totalmente arruinado por ______.

The school trip was completely ruined by ________.

 

En los últimos momentos, Michael Jackson pensó en ______.

In his final moments, Michael Jackson thought about _______.

 

En un mundo asolado por _______, nuestro único consuelo es _______.

In a world devastated by _________, our only solace is __________.

 

En una nueva película de M. Night Shyamalan, Bruce Willis descubre que ________ en realidad siempre ha sido _________.

In a new movie by M. Night Shyamalan, Bruce Willis discovers that _________ really has been ________.

 

Estudios revelan que las ratas encuentran la salida de un laberinto 50% más rápido después de ser expuestas a ________.

Studies show that rats find the exit of a labyrinth 50% quicker after being exposed to ________.

 

Guerra! ¿Para que sirve?

War! What is it good for?

 

Haz un haiku.

Make a haiku.

 

La Federacion Mexicana de Futbol ahora prohibe _____ porque les da una ventaja injusta a los jugadores.

In 1,000 years when paper money is just a distant memory, _________ will be our national currency.

 

La medicina alternativa ahora utiliza los poderes curativos de ______.

Alternative medicine now uses the healing power of ________.

 

La vida de los Indígenas cambió para siempre cuando los Españoles les trajeron _____.

The life of the indigenous Mexicans changed forever when the Spanish brought them ____.

 

Llamé ya para adquirir un ______. Nuestras esperan su llamada.

I already called to inquire about __________. We wait for your response.

 

Los antropólogos han descubierto una tribu primitiva que venera ________.

The anthropologists have discovered a primitive tribe that worships ________.

 

Mientras tengo sexo, me gusta pensar en _________.

While I have sex, I like to think about __________.

 

Mientras que los Estados Unidos competían contra la Unión Soviética para llegar a la luna, el Gobierno Mexicano gastaba millones de pesos en investigaciéon para _______.

While the USA was competing against the Soviet Union to reach the moon, the Mexican government spent millions of pesos investigating for ___________.

 

No entendía bien ________ hasta que me topé con __________.

I didn’t understand __________ until  I came up against ___________.

 

No se con que armas se peleará en la Tercera Guerra Mundial, pero la Cuarta Guerra Mundial se peleará con _______.

I don’t know what weapons will be used WW3, but WW4 will be fought with ___________.

 

Ojalá no hubiera perdido el manual de __________.

I wish I hadn’t lost the manual for ______________.

 

Para atraer más visitantes, el Museo Smithsoniano de Ciencias Naturales ha abierto una exhibición interactivia de ______.

To attract more visitors, the Smithsonian has opened an interactive ___________ exhibit.

 

Paso 1_____ Paso 2: _____ Paso 3: Dinero!

Step 1: _____ Step 2: _____ Step 3: Money!

 

¿Porqué estoy pegajoso?

Why am I sticky?

 

¿Porqué me duele todo?

Why do I hurt so much?

 

¿Porqué no puedo dormir en la noche?

Why can’t I sleep at night?

 

Próximamente, _________: El Musical.

Coming soon, ___________: the musical.

 

Santa Clos ahora les da _____ a los niños en vez de carbón.

Santa now gives _______ to children instead of coal.

 

Se dice que el plato favorito de Vincente Fox es ________ relleno de ______.

It’s said that Vincent Fox’s favorite meal is ___________  filled with ___________.

 

Si viajara al pasado, ¿que llevaría para convencer a la gente de que soy un hechicero poderoso?

If I go back to the past, what will I bring to convince the people that I am a powerful sorcerer?

 

¿Qué ayuda a que Felipe Calderón se relaja?

What does Felipe Calderón do to relax?

 

¿Qué cosa le parecería perturbadora pero extrañamente encantadora a la abuela?

What thing seems to annoy but actually is something that grandma loves?

 

¿Qué es ese sonido?

What is that sound?

 

¿Qué es lo más crujiente?

What is the most crunchy?

 

¿Qué es lo más emo?

What is the most emo?

 

¿Qué es lo que cenaba El Santo?

What does “The Saint” eat? (El Santo is a Mexican luchador).

 

¿Qué es lo que me ocultan mis papás?

What do my parents hide from me?

 

¿Qué es lo que nunca falla para animar las fiestas?

What never fails to liven up a party?

 

¿Qué es lo que prefiere Carlos Salinas?

What does Carlos Salinas prefer/like?

 

¿Qué estoy dispuesto a sacrificar para la cuaresma?

What am I willing to sacrifice during Lent?

 

¿Qué funciona siempre para ligar?

What always works when flirting?

 

¿Qué hace que me llene de gases?

What makes me gassy?

 

¿Qué hizo que terminara mi relación anterior?

What happened when I ended my last relationship?

 

¿Qué mejorá con la edad?

What gets better with age?

 

¿Qué no quisieras encontrarte en tu comida china?

What do you not want to find in your Chinese food?

¿Que placer culpable tiene Batman?

What is Batman’s guilty pleasure?

 

¿Qué traje de regreso de mis vacaciones?

What will I bring back from my vacation?

 

¿Qué utiliza la SEP para motivar a los niños a estudiar?

What does the Secretería de Education Pública use to motivate students to study?

 

Quizás la trae de nacimiento ______.

Since birth _________.

 

Una cena romántica a la luz de las velas no estaría completa sin ________.

A romantic candlelit dinner is not complete without_________.

 

Y el Oscar a ________ va para ________

And the Oscar for________ goes to___________

 

Yo tomo para olvidar ______.

I drink to forget _________.

 

*some of the cards have typos- so we’ve corrected the typos in the guide here. Some of them also threw us for a loop- like “Calzones cal rajita de canela” which literally means “cinnamon sliced underwear” but what that refers to is a mystery to our whole crew and the Spanish speakers we know the world over (if you're in on the joke- email us here- we'd love to hear from you). We’ve eliminated the handful of phrases we weren’t able to translate from the list.